Dang! It's Time To Admit...

It's definitely Fall outside. Autumn has finally come, and I'm fricking freezing! Ever since I moved into my new home last May, I've been enjoying my writing time on the deck. It's been nice having been able to say, "I've done most of my writing throughout the Summer months, outside, on the deck, while listening to the sounds of nature!"

Everyday, I'd finish my chores, and then head outside to assume my chair on the wooden floor of my 'outside' office. It's been a joy to me, listening to the birdsong, and the children laughing while at play, and watching the animals scurry busily about their day, the breeze blowing across my sun-kissed warm skin, and a glass of homemade Iced Tea, or Lemonade sitting on the glass table by my side. Like I said, "nice!" I've said it before, and I'll say it again, I get my best ideas for writing while outside! But lately, the days have turned colder, and I've tried to stay outside, enduring the chill in the air, and the stinkbugs landing in my fiery locks and on my laptop, and I didn't mind that so much. Though today, I was sitting outside where it's even too cold for the stinkbugs to come visiting, and I was trying to write, well, type, and I couldn't think through my chattering teeth, and my fingers were just not working correctly. Too many typo's and then it happened. I noticed that my fingertips turned blue! 

I'm in distress at having to move my writing time indoors. I'm not ready to be huddled inside in my office; which for the record, is really very nice with walls of butterscotch, and a chocolate-colored sofa where I have the freedom to pluck a book from my Barrister when I need to recharge my batteries, and languish. But the thought of being stuck indoors with my only connection to the outside, one lonely little window is, to say the least, a bit of a bummer. But alas, there it is, I'm forced indoors, and I don't want to be. I've said it! I can only hope that I'll get used to the imprisonment in my cozy office, and that the ideas and creativity will continue to flow. I hope. 

I guess the matter is, I'm finally admitting to myself, I'm saying, "goodbye" to the Summers' days. Saying, "goodbye for now" to the deck; my 'outside' office, with its wooden floor, and carpets of Kelly green lawns around it, its walls of leafy green trees and bushy shrubs, its ceiling of baby blue and lazy, puffy clouds overhead, the bright yellow of the day, and the fragrance of green and floral that I've enjoyed a great deal. I'm resigning myself to the idea that I'm going to be stuck indoors for the next six or seven months, and I know I don't like the idea, but I have to accept it. After all, if I can't get my fingers to work because they're too damned cold to tap the keys correctly, then it's too damned cold to be working outside!

I have to admit it to you, that the Autumn is actually my favorite time of the year. A time when the leaves of the trees burn bright with reds and golds that glitter in the noonday sun, and the pungent scent of decaying leaves, and the sweet odor of Fall's hay harvests, and the delectable acrid fragrance of fresh apples, spiced cider, and the glow of pumpkins and colorful Mums, please my senses. A time of year when I turn my attention to the excitement of a spooky Hallows Eve, hayrides and scare fests, and little kids dressed in cutesy or scary costumes, and opening their little bags for a sweet. A time of year when Turkeys are slowly roasting with bread stuffing inside, and family gathers around the table with thanks and gratitude and hope. A time when the fireplace is alight with warmth, and throws are used to snuggle under, and corner nooks are received with welcome to read a great book while the weather turns colder. The Salvia's and Hosta's and Silver Wormwoods' going to sleep and awaiting the arrival of Spring once more. I love the Fall, and all that comes with it, except for the knowledge that I have to say goodbye to the Summer, and writing outside.
 
But you know what? I think I'll get used to it! I'll get used to the new scenery, and in fact, maybe I have to admit that I'm looking forward to it a little bit; to being inside. Perhaps I really am looking forward to still days, while snow is gently cascading past my little office window, and the world is quiet, silent and white. Perhaps I'm looking forward to, howling winds, heavy sweaters, and freezing temperatures, fires alight, and my mind whirling with devilish plots and twists with a hot Peppermint Schnapps-laced cocoa next to me on my old desk, and maybe, just maybe, this will be better for me and my writing. No distractions, just me, my lil' Westie, my laptop, the cold, and my book. And, you know what else? I think I'm going to be okay with that! I think I am okay with that! In fact, I think I'm looking forward to it! Wow! Who would have thought that I'd be okay with saying, "goodbye" to the Summer, and that I'd start looking forward to time spent indoors? 

If I'm being honest, I haven't really spent much time inside my home since I've moved here, and maybe that's part of my issue! Could it be that I've enjoyed writing outside on the deck so much, that I've forgotten to bond, to form an emotional connection to my home inside? I think maybe I'm having an 'Eureeka" moment right now! Could it be that I'm accepting, nay, looking forward now to moving inside, and experience a whole new bonding with my new home? Ah. This feels so good to admit that I am looking forward to experiencing my writing life indoors! What can I tell you? I have to think these thoughts through before I can accept them, and now, here I am, telling you, that I am accepting my new thinking. I cannot wait to see what comes bubbling up into my writing from this new-found epiphany, this new found emotional acceptance! Now I'm excited, thinking of my new adventure inside. Could this day get any better? Is there anything better in the whole wide world than knowing that you'll have no distractions while you're writing your book? I think not. I think, for me, looking forward to writing indoors with a new perspective, is quite something! And that I'm looking forward to it, is something even more amazing. Just imagine what can be accomplished with no outside distractions? But, I think what I'll love most of all, is having my lil' Westie Terrier, Angel, snuggled up next to me on the sofa, while the snow is whirling outside my window, and finsihing my debut novel! Just my lil' Westie, me, and my book. I can't wait for the Winter now! What can I tell you other than, I'm Just Me...